The Angel

I am the angel who comes from above
I am here to bring light to the dark day
I am here to spread the whole world with love
But who said it was going to be that way?
You regard me as a symbol of hope
You all run to me. the young and old
My position you all envelop
I stare back at you - pitiless and cold
People rejoice in front of my stern face
Preacher says: “Evil paths we have taken
“But even though we have fallen from grace
“This sign shows we will not be forsaken!”

Sadly I am a messenger of doom
To say that the end is coming
Very soon


29th December 1998

The Simpsons

Some nights ago I turned on my TV
The Simpsons are on! I sigh with relief
But later I realize with disbelief
That this is not a cartoon that I see
Some people say seeing is believing
But what I see is life as we know it
Hardly amused, I feel compelled to spit
I cannot believe what I am seeing
The message presented here is negative
No one wins. Geniuses are ignored
Brats and punks are continually explored
I change channel for something more positive

With laughter of the damned this crap unfurled
I realise that this crap is the real world


27th December 1998

Spirit of Christmas

Christmas 1998 - Been and gone
And the millennium is approaching
But as Christ's birthday is still worth preaching
A concern hits me like bricks by the tonne

The birth of Jesus is a time of joy
The preacher says but no one is listening
There is this little boy who is grinning
He's getting a rocket powered toy

Now people only care about presents
I saw someone give a gift to a friend
The friend never got the gift in the end
The giver kept it - that's greedy nonsense

Shocked? Well that is life. And it sounds quite suss
The spirit of Christmas is lost to us


27th December 1998

Apocalyptic Future

This is how I envision your future
Nut then nothing is not quite what it seems
Gone is civilization that is pure
Nowadays people only live on dreams
You can achieve your dream in here. Or not
But whatever you choose you are insane
Some don't. They hang onto what they've got
Deluded civilization remains
Some people have dreams full of corruption
Sadly they are the ones that achieve their goal
Terror and violence. They spread disruption
So dominating, They have no soul

People lose sanity. So none can cope
Thus they have delusions. One being hope


27th December 1998

Childhood Fantasy destroyed by Reality

Then the teachers talking sent me to sleep
My brain switched off and into submission….

The Princess has been stolen by a creep
So I set off on a rescue mission
Bravely, I left my village and refuge
On my quest I leave civilisation
I see many sights - monoliths so huge
I march through places of desolation
To the creeps tower - A sight most uplifting
She will love me because I’m good hearted…..

But sadly, the teacher caught me shifting
And I got sent back to where I started

My mission failed at the tower’s gate
And so my princess will still have to wait


15th December 1998

Nobody Likes a Hero

Nobody likes anything heroic
Heroes suck - that is a philosophy
Everyone I know follows it - but me
That piece of propaganda makes me sick
Those where my final thoughts before I died
See my friends and I were on a jet plane
But jet control some nuts wanted to gain
Yes terrorists came along on the ride
Our lives and the jet plane. That they will fix
Nobody moved - under the philosophy
As the baddies fled - no movement - not me
As the plane went down - still no heroics

Body temperature is below zero
Becuase no one wants to be a hero


15th December 1998

A Life

And I have led an interesting life
But it is one that is far from happy
Three mental breakdowns added to strife
The first one was from a lost love most crappy

Mental breakdown no. two was from my peers
Miserable from those smaller than me
The third one was enveloped with my fears
Sadness caused from my ex. She did not see

And yeah I have attempted suicide
Twice. Both times due to people being mean
On both occasions I went home and cried
You will not believe the chaos I have seen

I have been so sad. My life is a mess
Seems I will never find true happiness


15th December 1998

Propaganda

Muscles, long hair, unshaven - male folly
"Go for this guys girls" - says words that are false
Says words from a magazine called Dolly
And I look on with a look of repulse
This crap tells fools who to see, where to go
The gullible, naive, those with no sense
"Check out Leonardo di Caprio!"
This crap shows no signs of intelligence
Nothing matters more than a brain dead hunk
Rubbish invades the mind of another sap
I still wonder who buys this load of junk
As propagandists deliver crap
Your way of public speaking is a farce
So stick your propaganda up your arse


12th December 1998

E is not for Empathy

Everyone else happily in a circle sat
Chatting away as happily as can be
They sat there talking about this and that
And every one was happy - All but me
I have turned my back on the happy bunch
Sobbing a stream of a thousand tears
Unaware everyone else eats their lunch
Unaware I need help from my fears
Everyone laughs and jokes - Each having fun
While I crawl up into an unseen ball
Waiting for the help that will never come
Isolated and neglected, I fall

All I ever wanted was empathy
But in their group they will never see me


3rd December 1998

The Temptress

She tore me apart and left me for dead
Seduction and lies go into her cake
My destruction is the plans she will bake
Unaware of the hurting in my head
I gave her all my love - what was a lot
Deluded I went on my hands and knee
All the while she cruelly laughs with glee
She gave me no love. Now it's what I got
Word of my folly was spread far and wide
Everyone went up to me and laughed
Her plan of doom did work well enough
And she drove me to attempt suicide

In her I put all my faith. Thus I fall
I'm down in the ground while she stands tall


3rd December 1998

Love and other doomed journeys

I was walking but then I found that track
No! They said but I wanted happiness
I left contentment and entered darkness
I begin my journey. But all in pitch black.
It’s dark in here. A flower will not bloom
Love and joy I seek. But I will not find
I stagger in the dark that makes me blind
I go on my doomed journey in the gloom
Frustration and anger grow in my head
And as images of my friends fade
I scream for help but receive no aid
I continue to stagger - left for dead.

Today I still stagger on my journey
Hear my story. Come here and walk with me


30th November 1998

Wish who were here?

Oh how I wish that she was here today
I need sympathy. She will understand
She gets me through taking me by the hand
All the things left unsaid. To her I will say
She wanted me but all was not sublime
I was not interested - Sad but true
But when I saw the light. She left me too
Still I return to claim what is mine
But now I am alone by methods foul
Boredom that eats me need retribution
I need to escape this institution
I do not care what's said. I need her now
I need to escape the jail that is this
I want her here now. It is her I miss


30th November 1998

Depression

That's it! Everything has all led to this
Everyone else is inside unaware
About the loner. But they don't care
That loser was someone they would not miss

Outside in the cold I stare at the sky
In the cold and dark night I search for hope
A symbol, anything, so I can cope
Nothing, no justice I let out a cry

They will not listen to me. It's not fair
Since no one cared for my cry for help
I throw myself to my death with a yelp
And everyone else is still unaware

All I ever wanted was empathy
Even in my death there's no sympathy


15th November 1998

I am at Fault

And so I am left out there in the cold
Slowly dying with no one to see
That I have something to say
Hear me
And this story will continue to unfold
They all saw me commit a shocking crime
They all turned their backs away from me
And showered the victim with sympathy
But I learned from this incident in time
As they all left me alone in the dark
I finally see the wrong of my crime
But it’s too late. I am there in the grime
And so, on this cold stone, I make my mark.

I should not complain when I am alone
For it’s nobody’s fault but my own


15th November 1998

Harsh Judgement

Circle of people, numbered thirty nine
They are in communion. They are legion
In friendliness I enter their region
Then things went wrong. I wasn’t given time
I stayed but they did not want me there
In fruitless attempts to be their friend
They got annoyed. They wanted me to end
And so they left me. They just did not care.
They were one. Anyone outside was a freak
When things went wrong they helped one another
It was nobody else. Only just each other
Their isolation made me lost and weak

Outsiders are not welcome in this zone
They all walked away and left me alone


15th November 1998

Madman

I have a problem but I have a cure
Jumping off a ten story city block
Laugh to my laugh, I plummet like a rock
Singing the Eighteen Twelve Overture
They left me did they? I will show them all!
Lonely. Isolation was their action
Now I gleefully face oblivion
I laugh sadistically as I fall
But the end must come to my happy ride
Becuase I now see the concrete footpath
And then I let out my final last laugh
My head cracks open. Blood runs like a tide
On impact I die in a bloody mess
And on my face a grin most hideous


15th November 1998

Agonised Screaming

I am alone. I have been left to die
They do not want me. They just want me dead.
Looking upward, I raise my battered head.
And then I scream an agonised cry
The demons of my troubled past won’t die
They still return. To hurt, destroy and haunt.
I see them and their methods of taunt
And then I scream an agonised cry
Love is a good reason for me to die
Everywhere there are couples around
And there are so many girls who turn me down
And then I scream an agonised cry

I scream for lost love, memories and rage
And so begins the traffic of this stage


15th November 1998

Shoot the Messenger

Maybe you don’t know me but I know you
You only cared for you. No other
Its only you. Not even your mother
Regardless I fell in love. And that is true
I said: “I’ll be yours if you be mine”
But you found out and said to me: “No way”
But my love for you goes on to this day
Again I go too far time after time
Leave me. You be alone. That is the cost
You bitch. No one likes you. Surprise, surprise.
But I love you and I don’t tell lies
However I’m deluded. I am lost

I am your candle in the cold dark night
I am nothing to you but I am your light


3rd October 1998

Whale Song

Come and see, see beneath the blue green sea
Drown yourself until you hear a song
Open your eyes and there you will see
Dolphins and whales more than 10 metres long
These beautiful great beasts in sounds they sing
High pitched squeaks along with deep low sounds
They do what they like. No one here is king
You will hear nothing like this on dry ground
The songs are sometimes sad. For this we grieve
We sit and see the performance unfurl
But we are needed at home. We must leave
We must leave them in silence and their world

So come with me now and take that one chance
And go to where the whales sing and dance


22nd August 1998

Morning After

Morning After (1998)

It was all over when the morning came
It started innocently enough
I went to a mate’s party to find fame
But it was a pissup
“Get drunk! Be tough!”
Onlookers chant
“Scul! Scul! Chug! Chug! Down!”
Finally I finished on the floor
Madness before me, I grin facing down
Then a girl came hips swaying like a whore
She really wanted a good hard
fucking
We went to the bedroom
Cheers from the lads
Protruding breasts, ready for sucking
Then she starting biting my nads

I sat on the bed as morning came in
I sat right there contemplating
my sin


2nd July 1998

When Stuart met Phillippa

I met her in a most unlikely place
In a world of madness
Insanity
Across the room into her pretty face
In it I saw none but serenity
She was something
had a reputation
I am with someone who is really cool
I made myself into her eye vision
But I ended up being a fool
She was beautiful
She did cleaning work
I showed a lot of appreciation
In her presence I annoyingly lurk
I end up screwing up conversation

She was an amazing person in the end
Here begins the tale of my new friend


21st June 1998