My girlfriend's better than you

My girlfriend’s better than Paris Hilton
Her head contains a working brain in there!
My girlfriend’s better than Katie Holmes - Yeah!
She doesn’t go chase after older men!
My girlfriend’s better than Lara Croft - true
She has the looks that only I can see
My girlfriend’s better than that Belldandy
Cos’ she picks me up when I’m feeling blue
My girlfriend’s better than Delta Goodrem
Her looks are twenty times more beautiful
My girlfriend doesn’t think that I’m a fool
Nor does she come from a celluloid film

Yes my girlfriend’s my sunshine, my lover
Because she catches the love I give her


25th July 2005

Mother I'm Strange

Mother, everyone says bad things to me
They keep telling me that I’m a retard
That they know something that I cannot see
They hit me with cruel words that strike so hard
Mother, nobody wants to be my friend
They won’t even try to see things my way
They call me stupid in ways that won’t end
Depending on what I do and what I say
Mother, why do they treat me terrible?
I’ve never done anything wrong to them
So why do they keep deeming me a fool?
Mother, please answer these questions I send

Mother, you said: “Son, you’re special to me”
So why can’t everybody else agree?


25th July 2005

Are you ready to be heartbroken?

I am in love with a woman so fair
She stayed with me when everyone else ran
Green eyes, marble skin, big smile, black hair
She appreciates me for who I am
But it’s her face I’m not allowed to touch
I can’t make my love for her crystal clear
Her heart won’t know how I love her so much
Cos’ her boyfriend wouldn’t like that idea
And so the love remains unrequited
What choice do I have? I can’t intervene
I just want her to be happy – not sad
So they will kiss whilst I can only dream

Love is placing one’s joy before your own
Even if it means being all alone


22nd July 2005

The ten worst break up lines

“Many women want to make love to me
To their satisfaction I must concede”
“I am more attracted to men honey
It’s within them that I find what I need”
“I’m in love with your mother. Yes it’s true!”
“I’m in love with your father. What a man!”
“Now’s the time I go to Nicole Kidman
She needs me more than ever. She’s so blue!”
“All I want from this is a good shag baby!”
“It’s not you, it’s me. And that’s the truth dear”
“Your hate of Lionel Ritchie disgusts me!”
“You’re simply too annoying! Am I clear?!”

“I love you but this won’t work out to please
Because you won’t let me wear your panties”


17th July 2005

I should get you smashed more often

There’s no use in trying to find the words
Don’t even bother - I’m not listening
I’ve got something on my mind so absurd
And the time is now for your realising
These feelings have been contained for too long
Days? Weeks? Months? I’ve given up keeping score
Being pushed past sign-posts that don’t say ‘wrong’
I want your eyes, your lips and so much more
I’ve given my conscience orders to leave
Because it’s your embrace that I’ve long sought
All I need now is for you to believe
Act now for your time is running so short

I need to know how to make you concede
To the fact that you are all that I need


17th July 2005

I’m proud to be an Australian

I’m from a nation founded by Britons
Just because their jails were overflowing
The Tasmanian Tiger’s a state icon
A creature we hunted to extinction
Anzac Day is acknowledged nation wide
Based around a military disaster
We’ve an anthem called Waltzing Matilda
A song about stealing and suicide
Eureka Stockade was our civil war
And it only lasted half an hour
And our capital? Our place of power?
An architectural feat but a real bore

Here’s to Australia, this land so strong
Hey twenty million piss-heads can’t be wrong!


11th July 2005

Spike’s lament on being single no. 5842684122

The hands crave human touch but there is none
The soul needs feeling but there is a hole
As the eyes can’t see that which is the one
Downhill all sense of hope begins to roll
The voice wants to say words but there’s no ears
The heart is empty but there’s no filling
The need to state these concerns is met with jeers
No other is ready to be willing
The mind is told that love is all around
The lips therefore asks “Why not around here?”
The goal keeps on refusing to be found
As the desolation becomes so clear

Spare me the reassurance you’re sending
As far as I know, the world is ending


11th July 2005

The paranoid ravings of a single man

No one wants any romance around here
The lengths people will go to seem absurd
No warm, fuzzy feelings - that is the word
And nobody will take this heart so dear
Independent women are now the rage
They can do any tough task by the score
Thus, they don’t need men like me any more
And so I’ve been shut away in this cage
And now, it’s acceptable to be gay
Thus now making the heteros frowned upon
No one’s telling me where I’m going wrong
No one wants to hear what I have to say

Ideas keep changing. I can’t keep the pace
On the deluded path to a false place


9th July 2005

Wasted

This day is beautiful beyond belief
The sun is shining and the clouds are blue
On this summer’s day, there’s nothing to rue
The soul sighs with long-over due relief
From my bones, the built up tension eases
The pain is cast away leaving no trace
As the sunlight beams on my smiling face
And the storm within my heart decreases
This long road has been walked upon before
Always stretching as far as I can see
It refused to lead me to victory
But defeat’s not a concern any more

The grin’s wide but the eyes are choked with red
From the two shotgun shells in my forehead


4th July 2005

University Student

I am here simply because I want to
Being here means I flee manual labour
I’m not here cos’ my parents want me to
And this right took an effort to procure
I’m walking the path that is right and true
Who cares if I take it too seriously?
What I’m doing some folk would love to do
Who wants to waste this opportunity?
I will do this: On my hands I won’t sit
Goofing off was done in high school
I want only to pass this course dammit!
Who cares if everyone calls me a tool?

I am here because I am here to learn
And achieve the destiny that I yearn


4th July 2005

Helping Hand

My brother isn’t as strong as I am
On this journey he will stumble and fall
While those around him keep on standing tall
And he keeps struggling on as best he can
But when he needs it, I’ll help my brother
I’ll reach out and give him a helping hand
And back on his own feet I’ll help him stand
Especially when there is no other
The weight I carry is not my concern
The fact that he’s weak isn’t a problem
Nor that he’s different from my fellow men
I just won’t sit around whilst he burns

And the reason why I act to his plea?
The fact I’m a member of humanity


4th July 2005

Reflections

Five years ago, a kid came to this spot
He was delighted that he’d arrived here
He walked with confidence and without fear
He walked to leave the past behind to rot
He walked with both of his eyes wide open
Ready to catch anything dealt his way
Not caring what everyone had to say
Not wanting to keep his future waiting
He walked well prepared to find his own place
He walked on his feet but not on his knees
And ready to forge his own destiny
And he did it with a smile on his face

And now, on this spot I’ve come back around
The kid’s inside me: I won’t let him down


4th July 2005