Wandering Through Heaven

Today I played guitar with Dave Mustaine

Talked to Alice Cooper on things scary

Played drums with Ringo and Nicko McBain

Saw Chuck Norris arm wrestle Mr T

I told Whitney Houston her voice was nice

Got to spar with Evander Holyfield

Talked ‘bout vampire fiction with Anne Rice

Told Tom Hanks how much his acting appealed

I discussed action movies with John Woo

Told Weird Al Yankovic he made me grin

Discussed physics with Isaac Newton - True

And told Don Bluth I loved Secret of NIMH

In a place people are pleased to see me

And tomorrow’s looking good already

Completed 6th April 2012

Bite Me

I’m the reason people become atheists
The reason pagans are interesting
Why Scientology is so arresting
The reason why The Matrix cult exists
I’m the reason people turn to Star Wars
The reason people make their own beliefs
And turn the old ideas into a sheathe
Thus making the believers into bores
I’m made fun of because they think it’s cool
They don’t want my offer of human help
They would rather beat me until I yelp
And cast me into their big box of fools

But even though they hurl words so unkind
Nothing they say will make me change my mind


26th November 2005

The Asberger Prayer (Going somewhere)

Lord, I hope you’re hearing me tonight
I have a problem that needs solution
I need a push in the right direction
I need to know what I’m doing is right
It’s hard to survive in this world you see
The people I talk to are confusing
Therefore it is my face that they’re refusing
Am I doing something wrong? Please tell me
Lord, I seek the services of your touch
To guide me through the odds against me stacked
To help me realise a plan of attack
I need your gentle guiding hand so much

Please walk with me as I go on my way
So tomorrow will be a better day


13th May 2005

All Atheists and Satan worshippers may find this offensive

For years I stumbled around in the dark
Cursing everybody and everything
Driven blinded by raw hatred seething
Until a voice came to me and said “Hark!
“Please do not be scared for I am the Lord
“It’s not too late to change your evil ways
“I’ll help you out of your tormented maze
“Believe in me – Your future will be forged”
Since then, I’ve been guided by a white light
Leading me onward to my destiny
Telling me there’s a better place to be
And this eventual prize is worth the fight

Who cares what everyone else was to say?
The Lord’s inside me and he’s there to stay


15th March 2004

I ride the Highway with Jesus

I ride this freeway with a friend in need
On the highway of life he will guide me
Jesus will lead me to my destiny
Yes, because he is a true friend indeed
Yes, I will do what he tells me to do
But you bet it’s going to be worth it!
Nasty comments don’t bother me one bit
As Jesus will life me up when I’m blue
I don’t care what infidels have to say
Because I’m happy with this way of life
I know Jesus will protect me from strife
With his help, I will see another day

He tells me everything will be alright
He’ll pat my back as I walk in the light


14th January 2001